When you have a defining moment with the Lord and receive His new vision, a process of change has begun in your heart. The Lord came to me during a challenging season in my life, one that had brought me to the end of myself. In my mind, I was finished. All I had known was gone. But God was far from being finished with me—He was ready to give me a fresh start. That new beginning would soon require me to make a choice and a step of faith that took me beyond my comfort zone.
Although the circumstances of our move to Houston hadn’t been what we desired, both my husband and I had settled in to great jobs there. My employer at that time was the best I had ever had. Along with giving me an active role in two business startups, my boss allowed me to be out of the office two days a week to attend classes full-time in order to finish my degree. Before I knew it, over a year had passed and I had never worked so hard in my life; but to me, things couldn’t have been more perfect. Every day, I was making progress toward my dreams. Then came my family’s weekend trips to Dallas… and what took place that first Sunday at church.
After service that day, the Chief-of-Staff asked if my husband and I could meet with her briefly before heading back to Houston. With everything the Lord had been doing, we were both more than curious. Long story short, during that meeting she told me that the church was interested in hiring me. Then she asked the strangest question I had ever heard in, what turned out to be, a job interview. What would I want to do there? While I was wrapping my head around that question, she added, “You know, sometimes people just don’t show up for work.” Huh? I was baffled. Potential employers usually knew exactly what they were looking for. And what did the “not showing up for work” comment mean?
In that moment, the peace of God wrapped around me like a warm blanket. With it came knowing that I shouldn’t answer quickly. So, I said that I would pray and get back to her. All the way to Houston, my mind was reeling. Could this really be happening? Then two days later, I had the dream/vision (described in my last blog) that jarred me to consciousness. What was God telling me? Was He leading us to move back to Dallas?
As the process continued to unfold, my spirit was on fire, but my soul was grieving. How could I have the greatest job, and the most wonderful boss in the world, only for God to begin pulling me away? I didn’t want to give up my position at that company. I didn’t want to stop taking classes and let go of the endowment I had been awarded, which covered all my tuition and books. But I couldn’t deny that, step by step, it seemed God was calling me to something new. Something I had talent for all my life but had never done on a full-time basis. So, He continued working in me, preparing my heart for the future. In order to take that next definitive step in my walk with Him and in my career, I couldn’t resist watering the seed of faith He’d planted in my heart. Despite my feelings, I had to move toward the new door He was opening. The Lord wanted, and expected, me to trust Him, and then DO what He was leading me to do.
Jesus told His disciples just days before going to the Cross, “I assure you, most solemnly I tell you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains [just one grain; it never becomes more but lives] by itself alone. But if it dies, it produces many others and yields a rich harvest” (John 12:24, AMP). I certainly wasn’t facing crucifixion, but I knew in my heart that God was compelling me to change, to be willing to let go. I knew that soon I would likely have to decide to walk away from my “picture perfect” arrangements at work and college to follow Him into a future I couldn’t define.
What about you? Is God opening a new door in your life?
And though you know He is at work in your situation, are you struggling to let go of things you value? I encourage you to take heart and embrace the process. God never requires us to water our seed of faith unless a greater harvest is on the way.
As I close, I agree in prayer with you that our Lord, who willingly gave His life so that you and I could live forever, would minister grace in your heart. May He expand His vision in you and increase your expectation of what is to come. And may the change He is bringing in your heart yield a harvest that extends far beyond you. In Jesus’ Name, let it be so!
“…work out (cultivate, carry out to the goal, and fully complete) your own salvation with reverence and awe and trembling (self-distrust, with serious caution, tenderness of conscience, watchfulness against temptation, timidly shrinking from whatever might offend God and discredit the name of Christ). [Not in your own strength] for it is God Who is all the while effectually at work in you [energizing and creating in you the power and desire], both to will and to work for His good pleasure and satisfaction and delight.” (Philippians 2:12 & 13)