Life has been a whirlwind of busyness. I take it as a blessing from the Lord, though. I pray for work, He sends it. I am a Full-Time Freelance writer. When I’m not writing, I’m not providing for my family. So, any job I receive is God’s provision. It has been this way for about a year and a half now since my Epilepsy diagnosis.
How I Got Here
In October 2019, I woke up on the floor of our restroom. I had a seizure. I wasn’t completely sure where I was or how I got there. I didn’t know it at the time, but I hit my head on the commode. We really didn’t think too much of it, and to be honest, I did have a couple of drinks that night. We figured I stumbled, hit my head, and that somehow caused it.
About a month later, I was in bed, without a drop in me, and had another seizure. This one my wife witnessed, and we knew it was time to see a doctor. Unfortunately, none of the tests revealed anything of worth. None of them to this day have shown anything revealing.
God Placed Thorns
Today I am under a doctor’s care, and my seizures are controlled by medication. I still have seizures, but they are less severe. Occasionally I have a bad day, but it’s something I deal with now. My wife does all the driving. I could if I want to, but I just don’t feel safe behind the wheel because I never know when the next one will hit.
I tell you all of this not to gain pity. I tell you because we never know how God’s provision is going to work in our lives. Remember Paul? He had a thorn in his flesh. We’re never told what his thorn is. Some speculate it was a speech impediment. Others say it was the hardships he constantly faced. Whatever it was, God placed it there. If you recall, when God is talking to Ananias about Saul, he says, “many things he must suffer for My name’s sake.” (Acts 9:16 NKJV) Paul’s thorn turned into his ministry.
This is My Thorn
I feel that my ‘thorn’ is my Epilepsy. I lost my job as a truck driver after my Epilepsy diagnosis. I wasn’t fired, but I was sidelined because my CDL was placed “on hold” until I met certain stipulations. I also no longer drive personally. Since I don’t drive, I cannot get to a regular job.
There is the silver lining of God’s provision through all of this. I am a writer. I have been a Freelance Writer for the past five years. I began while I was trucking. I would pull loads during the day and write after I parked my truck. That little bit helped establish me in the writing world. God used that little bit, and when I was unable to drive, He allowed it to explode into the writing career it is today.
Be Careful What You Wish For
You know the saying, “be careful what you wish for because you just may get it?” Well, the same goes for prayer. I’ve always prayed for the opportunity to write. God’s provision gave me the opportunity through what I was doing in my spare time. Then I was praying for the ability to write Full-Time. I prayed that prayer for a year. I don’t mean as a tag onto my prayer. I mean heavy-duty prayer for it. I wanted to be a Full-Time writer.
Then this happens.
Some will discount me saying that. That ‘why would a loving God allow something so bad happen?’ I cannot answer that. I just know when I was diagnosed, I had to give up driving. Driving took up 14 hours of my day. That left 10 hours off-duty, most was sleeping because I needed to be up again to drive. There wasn’t time for serious writing. I did it though. I held a part-time writing job—and still prayed for the opportunity to write Full-Time. So, when I was ‘forced’ to give up driving it freed up my time. A blessing? An answer to prayer?
The result was not immediate. Things were tight at first, but not for long. God tested my resolve. But I trusted His plan. In a little less than three months, I signed a long-term contract with one company writing a blog. I had two other companies I regularly wrote for, and I was still an editor for a copywriting firm I had been working for while I was a trucker.
Blessings in Disguise
God blesses us in ways we cannot imagine. Although, getting there may not always be sunshine and rainbows. I’ve learned sometimes blessings are precisely what we pray for, but they can come through adversity. Hardship may be the only way we can fully appreciate the blessings we receive. For me, I had to be put into a position where I had no choice but to work my tail off to get the next writing job, or rent was not going to get paid. But today, I work comfortably because I have a solid client base, and I am confident in my ability.
I prayed for the opportunity to write Full-Time, and now I am doing just that. God’s provision has given me the answer to my prayers and the opportunity to live my dream. But I’ve only talked about my career. I’ve not even mentioned that I’m also a published author. I have two published books, am working on my third, and have four Children’s books as well. God has led me down the path that I prayed for. I am blessed. It all came through what I feel is the ‘thorn in my flesh’ of Epilepsy.
God’s Provision: Answered Prayers
The success God has allowed me to have is proof that He answers prayer. It is also proof that we never know how He is going to answer prayer. We serve an awesome God. We just need to be willing to answer the call He presents us, in whatever fashion He presents us. I don’t know where my Epilepsy will take me. I feel fine today. I still experience seizures now and then, nothing serious, but I know the Great Physician. If He chooses to heal me, then I will be grateful, but if I suffer, then like Paul, I will bear it gratefully. And like another amazing man of God, I will say, “The Lord gave, the Lord has taken away, Blessed be the name of the Lord.” (Job 1:21b)
Read more on the GOD TV Blog – godtv.com
You can also watch GOD TV – god.tv